Law of Attraction “secrets” that #LOA enthusiasts never mention

The Law of Attraction has been the focus of several conversations within the past week, inspiring me to update the book I wrote on the topic several years ago, Crossing an Unseen Bridge: The Law of Attraction Secrets No One Wants to Talk About. I’ve put it near the top of my to-do list. In the meantime, I’ll discuss it here.

For those who have heard the term “Law of Attraction” or have seen the hashtag “#LOA” but are not sure what it means, let’s first look at what a law is and isn’t, what it does and doesn’t do:

Laws produce the same result every time for everybody

First and foremost, laws are predictable. They produce the same result every time for everybody. That’s what distinguishes a law from a possibility. Imagine this: You’re going to a football game and every seat in the stadium is filled. You can predict with certainty that not one seat will suddenly be vacated because its occupant randomly floated into outer space.

Why? Because the Law of Gravity grounds every edifice to the planet, including that stadium; ditto for every seat in the stadium and every physical being or object occupying a seat.

This phenomenon doesn’t happen occasionally or frequently. It’s governed by a physical law. Consequently, there are no flying buildings or flying people—unless you’ve heard of instances of which I am not aware. If so, please share.

Laws don’t require human intervention

The Law of Attraction is KARMA by another nameWe don’t have to do anything to invoke the laws of gravity or attraction. We don’t have to read books or attend seminars to learn how to use these laws for our benefit. They are in effect all the time, without our awareness, intervention or facilitation.

Many disagree, starting with the creators of the 2006 “The Secret” movie and Rhonda Byrne’s bestselling book of the same title. They claim that the Law of Attraction doesn’t work unless we work it.

They contend that with some effort, we can attract everything we want or need. All we have to do is:

  • Repeatedly think about the object, situation or person of our desire (i.e., make it our dominant thought),
  • Believe that it will manifest, and
  • Maintain positive emotions that our desired outcome will manifest. The more gleeful we feel, the higher our vibration and the more likely it is that we will match the vibration of our desired thing.

If humans can manipulate the Law of Attraction to produce what they want, everyone who has followed these steps consistently receives what he or she wants, without one exception because laws produce the same results for all.

If we follow the same directions and get a different result, it is not a law

Since 2006, more than a million people have seen the “Secret” movie, bought the book, paid for seminars and practiced the principles espoused by the motivational speakers who appeared in them. Some of them got precisely what they desired—but not everyone. That would be a clue.

Sometimes we ignore clues. During a 2008 show that focused on what I call the commercialized version of the Law of Attraction, a couple of women had LOA testimonials. One claimed that because she decided to think positively about her husband’s surprise lay-off, and celebrate rather than mourn when he returned home, he landed an even better job weeks later. (One might ask what she was thinking before he was laid-off, if LOA did all that.)

Oprah shared an LOA testimonial of her own: She claimed that she had attracted a beautiful silver bubble blower from Tiffany & Co., just minutes after declaring to a guest who was making phenomenal bubbles that she’d love to have a bubble blower.

Wow! What a powerful demonstration of LOA, she thought. I didn’t. And she confirmed it when she finished the story:

In the next breath, Oprah told the audience that her assistant had given her that bubble blower from Tiffany & Co. several months earlier. Yes, months before a bubble blower was even on Oprah’s radar, let alone on her wish list, that gift had sat in her office, unopened. Her assistant brought the gift to Oprah’s attention after she mentioned it on the air.

Not to disparage Oprah. I like her personally. We socialized when we worked together at ABC-7 years ago. I’ve brought in a New Year at her home; I think she’s cool people and would never do or say anything to intentionally mislead anyone. But not only did she drink the LOA Kool-Aid, she gave credit to LOA that belonged to her poor assistant who’d been waiting for months for her gift to be opened.

I remember that incident so vividly because it inspired me to write “Crossing an Unseen Bridge.” Thank you, Girlfriend!

We must think before believing

If life worked as LOA disciples claim, everyone who follows its prescribed steps would attract their desired result. There would be no exceptions: Every sick person who wanted to be healed would be. Everybody who didn’t want to die would not. Everybody would be admitted to the college at the top of their list. Everybody would land the job and marry the mate of their desire.

People in countries who desperately want clean water, access to affordable healthcare and an end to war would receive that. And everyone who wants a lovely gift in a Tiffany box within minutes of expressing a desire for one. In fact, banish the thought, everyone who wanted to be released from prison would simply have to focus on their freedom, visualize themselves on the outside, and feel the ecstasy of that moment when they walk out of the pokey. Whoo hoo! Freedom! Praise LOA! Hallelujah, amen!

There are a number of other secrets that LOA enthusiasts don’t tell us. I’ll share them with you next week, starting with this little factoid: The monetized version of the Law of Attraction pretends that two words don’t exist in our vocabulary: Surprise and disappointment. In fact, you might call it LOA’s Achilles’ heel.

Know that I love you much—and I encourage you to keep thinking before believing.

Overcoming Disappointment: Part 1

Disappointed young manPhysicist Albert Einstein asserted that we cannot solve problems from the same level of consciousness at which they were created. Perhaps that’s why I’m seeing an increase in requests for one-on-one Drama Queen Workshop consultations.

It appears that more of us are beginning to realize that we can’t solve a problem until we fully understand it. At the current level of consciousness, some things seem absolutely incomprehensible; so it seems logical, perhaps even natural, to come at it from another vantage point.

Unquestionably, problems look starkly different when you’re standing in the footlights of the world’s stage than when you’re sitting in the balcony. Frequently, the solutions to those problems can easily be spotted from up there, too. With that possibility in mind, we begin to look for the solutions together.

Even though each person has a different set of circumstances and concerns, I’ve noticed that one problem seems to arise more frequently than others: Disappointment. Many are disappointed by the situation they’re in, the person they’re with or the direction their lives have taken. They had a different vision and grander expectations. Therein lies the rub.

Expectation: Root of Disappointment

I think my “all the world’s a stage” mentor, Shakespeare, has given voice to a truth that a lot of us choose to ignore: “Expectation is the root of all heartache.” Instead, we follow directives to create expectations and visualize those expectations in great detail. They tell us to feel euphoric, as if we actually have received what we desire.

Some even tell us that if we don’t expect something, we won’t get it. But what is a disappointment but an unfulfilled expectation? And, oh—by the way, how do these folks explain surprises: those gifts that we never envisioned?

My unexpected trip last year to Egypt—on short notice, with all expenses paid, including a luxurious suite in a five-star hotel on the Nile River—comes to mind. My daughter, Maiysha, was headlining the “Sing Egyptian Woman” competition as part of a cultural exchange program for the U.S. Embassy in Cairo.

I accompanied as her publicist. The trip far exceeded my most vivid imagination!

Days after we returned, I had to cancel a long-planned, highly anticipated, prepaid trip to a conference in San Juan. So much for expectations.

What is the real “secret” to manifesting our desires?

Pat at the sphinxWhenever I mention my trip to Egypt, others ask: “How did you manifest that? I want to do that!”

I tell them the same thing I wrote in my book on the Law of Attraction secrets no one wants to talk about: Manifesting depends more on “being” than “doing.” Your soul history plays a significant role, too. I can’t delve into that in a blog post; however, in my metaphysical memoir, I do cite a surprising, real-life example of how my soul’s ancient history impacted my 20th century life.

Chances are, you don’t know anyone who has never experienced a disappointment or a surprise. You probably don’t know people who have always received what they expected. I’m sure the same is true of those who tell us how critical it is to have expectations, so it’s difficult for me to believe that they are unaware that their claim is fallacious.

We want to hear that we control our lives and our experiences here, and there are those who are willing to tell us that we do–sometimes they even charge a fee to hear it. But the fact that so many of us pray for one outcome or another is evidence that humans don’t have total power over what manifests here. So why do some spiritual leaders and motivational/transformational speakers tell us that?

I’m sure their hearts’ desire is to empower and motivate us. But are you more likely to empower someone or set them up for disappointment by misleading them?

You can have everything you want. Really.

From up here in the Balcony of Life, it appears that Spirit said, “You can have everything you want.”

Before finding out if Spirit had said all It had to say, folks excitedly dashed off to “empower” people with the few words they heard. Word spread like wildfire. Apparently, no one asked, “Then why don’t I have it already?”

Short answer: Spirit sees us as souls. When It says “you,” Spirit isn’t talking about the physical body costume you are wearing. The body merely enables you to be visible on Earth’s stage now. It is not “you.”

Indisputably, you can have everything you want. In fact, you do have everything you want, Dear Soul—YOU, not your body. Whatever situation you’re in, whatever you manifest here, you—as an eternal soul—created it.

Understand that to the soul, a human lifetime is a bat-of-an-eyelash experience. Whether a prince or a prisoner, it’s just a role to the soul: a way to experience Life in a different way, learn some lessons, create or complete some karma.

While that’s fine and dandy for immortal souls that have written the scripts, their mortal bodies might be catching hell. That’s when my phone starts ringing and my e-mailbox blows up.

Why did I create this? How does it serve me?Then begins the first step on the journey to find the source of the discomfort. It always starts with this question: “Why did I, as Soul, create this painful situation?”

Life isn’t random, and what happens here on Earth is not intended to hurt us. In fact, as immortal souls, it’s impossible to hurt us. Our only pain comes from our belief that we are mere mortals, disconnected from God.

That, in itself, creates a lot of uncertainty and insecurity that leaves us vulnerable to scary stories about an angry vindictive Being who lives far away in the sky, solves problems by killing humans, and has threatened to come down here to judge us, then sentence us to an eternity of torture.

It’s a not-so-Divine drama starring someone who’s certifiably satanic. He demands that we love and worship him, and we do.

Why, God, why?

You’ve heard that everything happens for a reason. Essentially, every drama in which we find ourselves was scripted purposefully. That’s why the most appropriate questions to ask when we want to move to another scene is, “Why did I, as Soul, create this horror flick? How does it serve my life’s purpose?”

If you dare to ask these questions, Spirit will answer. It’s the one thing I can say you can expect. Your answer may come through—wait for it—unexpected channels: a commercial on TV, something someone says in the line at the grocery store, or one of those “something told me” moments when you’re alone.

Stay open. Listen. Trust. If you want to, drop me a note and tell me what you heard—and how it made you feel to get a response. If you must visualize, see yourself surrounded by unconditionally loving souls who are always available, willing and able to support you through your toughest times.

In Part 2, we’ll go a little deeper and explore ways to eliminate disappointment from your life experience.